While using the instant messaging make your words impressionable to the other person. Spelling words correctly is a must. Use punctuation and do not use profane language. Remember, you are just meeting the person and want to create a good relationship. In other words, be on your best behavior!
If you are initiating the instant message, mention something about the profile that grabbed your attention. Share any common interests mentioned in the profile. This is a great beginning to any conversation. Using a great opener about one of your hobbies could initially break the ice. If the person mentions children and you have children talk about your children.
The beginning of every relationship is based on common interests and life experiences. After the foundation has been established, take it to the next level and flirt if that is in your personality. As with any relationship, flirting is a normal act of saying, “hey, I do like you.”
If someone does or says something to make you feel uncomfortable, do not continue to talk to them. Listen to the inner voice telling you to beware. It is common nature for everyone to have the ability to know when things are not comfortable. This is one of the best things about chatting with someone online; you can ignore them and not continue any communications.
After getting to know a person, it is all right to share some personal information. Be careful with the information shared. Even though you feel you know the person, you still have not met them in person, so you do not really know them at all. Anyone can be talking to you from a computer. Until you meet face to face, be cautious with personal information.
Do not let the person demand answers or badger you into anything. If you do not want to provide information, do not give it to them. If the person you are communicating with starts to get rude, jealous, or demanding online, think of how they will act in person. Those actions are not a good sign of a good or nice person.
After getting to know someone, it is time to talk on the phone. This is taking the communication to the next level. Only do this, if you are very comfortable with the person you have been chatting with daily. This is the level that will allow the relationship grow even more. Hearing the voice of the person adds to the attraction. Share phone calls and talk in more detail about things. Try not to let the other person call you all the time. Hearing from him or her every other week is a good beginning.
Soon the time will come to meet in person. This is the ultimate goal of meeting people. Select a public meeting place. Drive yourself and arrive on time. Have fun and if this is the right person, consider taking the relationship to a better level, the first level in a secure relationship is friendship.